Malice has spoken openly about a difficult period of eighteen months in which he says he lost his sense of direction, discipline, and belief in himself. In a personal statement, he looks back on a phase in which he felt increasingly disconnected from the music that once inspired him to become an artist.

ALSO READ: Is the old romance of spending weeks making music under pressure?

“He made me fall in love with the music and inspired me to start a career myself”

Malice says his doubts began when raw hardstyle changed significantly over the past few years. The sound he grew up with and felt deeply connected to became increasingly unfamiliar to him. “I come from a period where raw hardstyle was very different. The A2 Records era was crucial for me, but the artist who truly changed my life was Delete. He made me fall in love with the music and inspired me to start a career myself.”

According to Malice, the new direction of the genre aligned less and less with what he personally enjoyed listening to and creating. “Raw hardstyle moved in a direction that, personally, didn’t reflect what I truly loved to listen to and to create.” That shift caused confusion. “That’s when I lost my direction. I thought: okay, what am I supposed to create now?” That uncertainty directly affected his self-belief. “You no longer know if your music is still appreciated. Whether people want what you always did, or expect you to reach out to something completely new.”

Responsibility

In his message, Malice emphasizes that this period is not about making excuses, but about taking responsibility. For him, that starts with keeping promises to yourself. “I believe self-esteem begins with keeping your own promises,” he explains. One of those promises was to keep making music and not let down his fans, even during a time when he questioned whether he still deserved their support.

“Even when I wasn’t active, people came up to me at events. They asked for pictures, showed me their Malice tattoos, and told me they were waiting for new music.” That realization left an impression. “As DJs, we sometimes take that for granted, but it’s something very special. Very few people get to experience that in their lifetime.”

The turning point

The real turning point came when Malice noticed his position starting to weaken. “If I didn’t find my passion for making raw hardstyle again, I could eventually lose everything,” he says. At the same time, he stresses that such phases are part of being an artist. “Everyone has ups and downs. There’s no shame in that. What matters is that you try to get back up, in your own way.”

“Making music is therapy for me”

That experience has changed his view on success. Where he once tried to make music that aligned with trends, Malice now consciously follows his own feelings. “For me, success is getting recognition while doing what you truly love.”

He sees music as more than just work. “Making music is therapy for me. Through a heavy kick, an emotional melody, or a screamed vocal, I release pain and darkness.” His hope is that others can relate to that. “Nothing makes me happier than knowing I made someone feel better with what I created.” The response from fans made him realize he has built something meaningful. “I can’t just let that disappear. I still love making music.”

That mindset can be heard in his recent release ‘SCREAM WITH ME’, which Malice describes as symbolic of the direction he wants to follow going forward. The track connects to earlier releases centered around emotion and inner struggle, such as STRONGER, DEMON INSIDE ME, and ANOTHER DAY. “I made those tracks to vent and release demons I’ve carried with me my entire life.” Musical choices on the track were entirely instinctive. “I used a ‘microwave kick’ in the main drop. Not to follow trends, but because combined with the screaming vocals, it triggered something in me. When I made the track, it felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders.”

Looking ahead to 2026

With his vision clear again, Malice looks ahead. In 2026, he plans to release new music regularly and gradually build a new discography. He also wants to strengthen his connection with fans, fueled by the response to his recent video and release.

In closing, Malice highlights the human side of the artist’s life. “As you can see, I’m a human being with flaws and qualities, just like everyone else,” he says. According to him, social media often presents a distorted image. “We’re not invincible machines, even though it can sometimes look that way online.” His message is personal and clear: “Stay connected to me. I hope the music I release from now on gives you the strength to face whatever obstacles life puts in front of you.”

What Malice is going through is not just a comeback, but an evolution as an artist.